When people talk about love, it’s assumed that it’s just a given for everyone, and that your perfect match is just around the corner. But what happens when you’ve been burnt so many times, romance is nothing more than a fairy tale? TV star, influencer and Agony Aunt Paisley Billings helps out reader Jessie, who’s found her Prince Charming, but feels bad for a close friend who believes she’s going to be alone forever
The big problem
My friend is the best – so smart, talented, and beautiful! We’ve been close for nearly a whole decade now, since the start of university, and in all that time, she’s been really unlucky in love. She never seems to find the right person, and she ends up getting heartbroken after they either cheat, or dump her in a really savage way (like, ghosting her for a month). It’s really getting her down, and she literally has lost all confidence in herself. She’s said so many times that she’s just meant to be alone. I’ve recently gotten engaged, and although I know she’s happy for me, I’m hesitant to talk to her about it because I can sense that it’s made her feel a little bitter. How can I pull her out of her romance funk – and hopefully, help her to see how brilliant she is, and not give up hope?!
Thanks,
Jessie
Paisley’s advice
Hi Jessie,
First of all: congratulations on your engagement. I must say I think it’s very lovely that you care so much about your friend. A true friend who has been around for nearly a whole decade would be extremely happy for you on your engagement too. Please don’t be hesitant talking about it with her; if you ignore it, she may end up feeling pushed away and left out. Getting her involved in the planning of the wedding might just help her out of her romance funk. Also, make sure you spend time together, just you two – maybe do something to help build confidence, like a dance class, or experiment with new looks. Remind her that not everyone’s timeline is the same. When the time is right, love will happen for her. Weddings have a way of bringing people together and they are a great reminder that there is someone out there for all of us. You never know – the guy she’s been looking for might just be a guest at your wedding.
Sending love & light,
Paisley B xxx
