We all go through various stages in our lives, morphing into different incarnations. Embracing change is easy if you have found the still core of your being. By Caroline Shola Arewa

It is said that change is the only real constant in life. We move from one scene to another, living, loving and learning as we travel through the drama called life. Transformation means different things to us at differing times on life’s journey.

Take me, for example. I remember a time when transformation for me meant a nice new outfit with matching accessories – I was a fashion designer. Next, it was feeling good in my body, no excess weight, totally fit and healthy – I was a yoga teacher. Then, it was experiencing freedom from tension and having energy flowing freely through my body – I was a body therapist. After that, transformation was about releasing psychological trauma as a psychotherapist. Underlying these various incarnations of myself as a facilitator of spiritual and personal development is a sense of stillness and simply being. A place where the real me resides. It is the hub at the heart of the wheel; the point in the very centre that remains still despite all the incarnations of fashion, spirit, mind and body. Stillness, no matter how fast the wheel of life turns.

The journey of female transformation takes us from daughter and sister to girlfriend, wife, lover, mother, professional, business owner, boss, elder and numerous more destinations as we travel. It’s exhausting even to think about it. Let’s just say women are skilful jugglers of life! But when life is better described as a balancing act rather than as “balanced”, it is time to seek the still point. As life takes you on a roller-coaster ride of highs and lows, have you found your still point? That place of peace, stillness and just being with all that is? That’s the ultimate transformation. In the final analysis, it’s not about the person we think we are or the persona we show the world or the possessions we accumulated; it’s not about your waist size or your bank balance. It’s about You with a capital Y, the essence of who you truly are. Not who you think you
are, but who you truly are.

Sometimes we have to take a step back and reflect, or, as John Lennon put it: ,“I’m just sitting here watching the wheels go round and round. I really love them to watch them roll. No longer riding on the merry-go-round. I just had to let it go!”

The essence of transformation is change. The secret of transformation is conscious awareness – being truly awake as you journey. Why? Because when you are awake you have choices about how your life changes. You are not only playing the starring role in the drama of your life – you are writing the script and directing. You are making the decisions in your own transformation story.

What is your life story so far?
What have been your biggest challenges?
What are your greatest achievements?
What major lessons have you learned?
What have you still to do?

I invite you to write your story of transformation. It can be as long or short as you like. Take time to reflect, feel your energy field open and let your story reveal itself. Many people have done this with me in my workshops. The
most incredible transformation stories are written and told. I am sure you have a story of courage, love and transformation waiting to be told. 

When you have written your transformation story (it doesn’t have to be perfect), tell it. Read it to a loved one; preferably the next generation. Tell it in the third person: “There once was a woman…” Let your story unfold. Create it with the perfect ending or leave it ongoing.